I don't want to be treating you for stroke or heart attack

So said my doctor this morning.

Despite major dietary efforts for the last two years, I've got hypertriglyceridemia - which is a form of high cholesterol, apparently.

And to go with the doctor's words, here's what's now on the 'Foods to avoid' list:

• Whole eggs, egg yolks
  
• Whole milk and its products - butter, cream, cheese, ice-cream, yoghurt, condensed milk
  
• Brains, liver, pate, liverwurst, kidney, sweetbread
  
• Prawns, squid (calamari), fish roe, caviar, fish 'fingers', canned fish in oil (eg sardines)
  
• Fatty meats - bacon, ham, sausages, salami, canned meats, pressed meats, meat pastes, hamburger mince
  
• Duck, goose, skin of chicken and turkey, pressed chicken
  
• Pies, pasties, pastries, cakes, doughnuts, biscuits
  
• Fried chicken, chips, fish, dim sims, spring rolls, etc., hot dogs, pizzas, fried rice
  
• Cashews, macadamia nuts, cocnut, roasted nuts, brazil nuts, peanuts, peanut butter (Can have in very small amounts)
  
• Gravies, potato chips, caramel, chocolate (including carob), butterscotch, 'health food' bars, fudge, coffee whitener and other cream substitutes, toasted breakast cereals (especially with coconut)
  
• Saturated fats - lard, dripping, suet, copha, cooking (hard) margarine, coconut and palm oils, mayonnaise
  
• Fried foods, foods roasted in fat.
  

Wow. I'm looking forawrd to living on trhe cardboard boxes all the foods I like are packed in.

There is an accompanying list of 'Suitable foods' but it's just too depressing.

So that's no more brains fried in lard with sweetbreads on the side for you for a mid morning snack then, Zatty....

Yep.

Might as well be a freakin rabbit.

Dandelion leaves and grass are on the 'good' list are they?

Poor thing

The upside is that you will lose so much weight that they will start treating you for AIDS

Thanks (I think) taips.

Selected items from the 'Eat this' list...

Egg whites, cottage and ricotta cheese, bread, crumpets, almonds, canned spaghetti, alcohol (small amounts)...

Anyway, pardon me, but Mrs Zat has cooked my dinner and I must go and eat now.

Rice. With a little bit of chicken.

Of course, she's having a nice Korma...

That's ridiculous. Crumpets are worse for you than macadamia nuts. And most rice is high GI. Idiotic.

Crumpet is non fattening

High GI doesn't = high bad cholestoral levels.

Yes, but the list definitely says crumpets. Maybe he's supposed to indulge in threesomes . . . though I'm sure the Mrs would have something to say about that . . .

eowyn wrote:High GI doesn't = high bad cholestoral levels.

No, but high GI foods are not usually the order of the day for people with potential heart problems. Besides, who can live on bloody rice?

the way you were going hyper I knew something was wrong ... tried my level best to restrain myself despite umpteen provocations.

I guess I was right after all ... well done me. *pats himself on the back*

btw check yourself for diabetes too .. sometimes cholesterol goes out of whack despite all self-control due to insulin issues.

People did in Japanese prisoner of war camps, just.......

Low G.I. came about from improving diabetics diets and having foods that keep blood glucose levels at a more constant level, rather than having a quick surge and then low drop you get with High G.I. foods, the heart benefits are a side benefit.

Aye, and I've seen the photos. Looks like Belsen.